Saturday, May 23, 2009

Air


He thought it was an asthma attack, then the radio announced that the atmosphere had been privatized. Coughing, he called his neighbor, who answered with a sore throat. 'Yes, it is true', said the neighbor,'you should pay in the counter by the garbage bins. It goes by hours,Sundays are free'.


*
He ran to the garbage bin and introduced all the coins he had in the newly installed Global Air Co. counter. 'Thanks', said the counter. The machine also asked him whether he wanted a receipt, but he was looking the other way doing some breathing exercises he had learned ina Yoga course he left unfinished due to persistent back pains and boredom. Curiously, there was no smell of the garbage in the private air. Advantages of modernity, he thought.


*
Down at the bar, over a beer, his friends where discussing it. Half of them were for the air privatization and half against it. The argument for was that the private air was efficient and clean and only allowed good smells. The argument against is that not everyone could affordit. Then the TV showed a repetition of last years best Soccer games and they stopped talking about it. 'I need some holidays', he thought. He asked his friends whether anybody was for a trip to the beach inthe weekend. All of them had work to do. The companies they worked for had decided that weekends were a reminiscence of the past and led to inefficiency. Fortunately, he was unemployed. Thus, he borrowed somemoney for more Global Air expenditure and a weekend in the beach.


*
'Welcome to Las Palmeras Beach. You are entering private property'. He was not surprised. He filled in some coins in the World Air counter bythe Beach reception and bought a ticket: special package offer, 30minutes real sea water swim and free lying in the sand plus arefreshment and surprise.
While playing with the waves, an old man approached him smiling.'Would you care for some deep conversation looking at the horizon?'. Of course, he did. It cost only five Euros. The old man quoted some famous sayings in a low tone of voice. 'Everybody should love the sea. The sea is our past and our future', the old man said. 'Absolutely,there is nothing like the sea. I remember...' 'Time is out, interrupted the old man, 'if you want to continue having a deep conversation you will be charged'. 'Is this the surprise of thespecial package?', he asked. 'No,' replied, the old man, 'the surprisewas supposed to be a shark attack show. But the shark is currently being repaired. Software problems. It will be on next week. Talk with reception'.


*
He was so touched by the conversation with the old man that he forgot to pay the ticket for Monday's air quota while leaving Las PalmerasBeach. Driving home he remembered the weekends in the beach with his parents, when he was a kid. He then arrived home, drank a non alcoholic beer and went to bed. He died relatively peacefully in his sleep before anyone could do anything about it. Due to the recent air privatization campaign and the high demand, prices for burials had gone up. However, his friends found a special asphyxia offer in the neighborhoods church's funerary home. Bury one friend and get the next two half price. They all cried a bit for him before rushing back tothe office.

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